Tag Archives: breakup

What is healthy after a breakup?

I’ve broken up with my boyfriend two days ago for reasons like our mentalities are different, and how it matters to me for him to be ambitious to some extent.  I am not looking to change him, so instead, I ended it, amicably.  We were both sad about it but none of us hurt each other in the process so far.  One would say, why be with him in the first place if your mentalities are different.  Actually we got along very well and seemed to be compatible. It’s just that the more time passes by, the more you get to know the person.  Maybe we rushed the dating part of the relationship as we transitioned quickly into boyfriend/girlfriend territory where we would be exclusive. 
As for now, a couple of days after the break up, I sometimes find myself missing him immensely, but talking myself through those moments seems to help. We decided that we shouldn’t talk until a good amount of time had passed in order to give each other space to try to be sad and move on. However, on the night we broke up I call him to check up on him and we talk a bit. On the next day, we exchange some messages.  They say  to take things at your own pace while trying to move on.  I am afraid of getting too sucked in to conversations with him to the extent we would be doing ourself harm. That includes staying attached to someone you actually have no future with.
I hope we don’t end up hurting each other for whatever reason.